Opening Day Thoughts

Here we are on Opening Day for the 5th season of No Quitters II. This column is more of a beat writer's comical look at the league and if you don't laugh during it you are probably dead...or Bill Belichick.

We begin by congratulating Tacoma and it's owner Threester on his season 4 World Series win, and second since the creation of the league. A really amazing accomplishment. His off-season was a pretty good success by adding Bill Sanford and his Paul Bunyan power. And that should develop more with his new trainer Brian Mcnamee. But enough about Tacoma I'll leave the rest to the season preview.

The most interesting signing (read "Paul Depodesta signing Juan Pierre's contract" interesting) was from our boy in the Capital MrDanielX. He signed Hector Unamuno to a 5 year deal for $59 million. He must have been tainted by being in DC. Oh well, Unamuno will help out this year but you have to wonder about last season when his is 39 and getting paid $12. I wonder if he knew that Unamuno recently started a relationship with Alyssa Milano, MrDanielX better have done his homework.

Though at least MrDanielX knew what he was doing. The idiot owner KingDime1332 was talking to some of his minor league staff to move players around different levels. Well instead of saying promote he said release and checked the wrong box and put Trot Locko on the wavier wire. I guess it pays to be literate.

Spring training served as a wake-up call to LCCooler hit .198 with a .260 OBP. But wait folks thats not it he also had a 2.22 WHIP and 10.66 ERA. And you think it couldn't get any worse right? Wrong, the man also had a .977 fielding percentage (worse in the Majors). That's right Lccooler decided to bring in only junior high girls softball players to spring training. Intriguing move, lets see if it pays off during the season.

And finally there are some new owners that deserve a welcome. Rawdk27, Tjeman, Will9899, Playboy33, Orabbi, Acroth, Fosco, and Pirateswin2 ( but definitely not in a row) welcome to No Quitters II.